Globalization Means Everything Breaks At Once

F

Fucking reptilians everytime.

 

Holy fucking shit.

Basically, Ethereum is the fuckoo coin built around "smart contracts", where "code is law". The DAO, standing for Decentralized Autonomous Organization, was a fuckoo coin build on top of Ethereum to be a kind of investment collective.

The DAO runs via a code brick by some overpromising hacks that set up the whole deal. You're supposed to be able to write "smart contracts", where the program automagically holds and distributes the money, no intermediary needed.

You'd trade Ethereum tokens for DAO tokens, and then vote with them on different ventures. Say some guy wants 100 fuckoos to print T-shirts, and he's expecting 200 fuckoos in return. You can vote with the collective on if you want to give him those tokens.

The DAO got around $150,000,000 in crowdfunding money before some hacker found a way to drink their milkshake.



A gamebreaking bug in The DAO that went all the way down to the Ethereum Virtual Machine under it allowed a guy to ask for his money, and then ask for his money another bajillion times before the first request closed out, and slurp that tasty Ether out before the code noticed he didn't have that much available to withdraw.

This is the altcoin built under the premise that "the code is law", that if the contract was written in a way that allows it to happen, then it's legal. The entire premise of Etherium is that mistakes don't get bailed out like the banks did. "Transactions are final; applications are unstoppable."

So what did they do when this debacle happened? That's right, they told the hacker that found a legitimate, legal (if unethical) transaction in their smart contract to fuck off, did a hard fork of Ethereum, and rejiggered the entire currency to fix the fuckups of The DAO. You know, like honest, principled people do.

The DAO shut down, but don't worry about those guys, they're making smart contracts for the Internet of Things now: Second Life? Failed DAO Creators Are Making a Comeback Bid - CoinDesk | https://www.coindesk.com/second-life-failed-dao-projects-founders-are-making-a-comeback-bid/

They're making Smart Locks now! They're also doing The DAO again, this time with charity money:

"Slock.it CTO Christoph Jentzsch last year revealed his plans for Charity DAO, designed to be a philanthropic implementation of The DAO concept.

According to Tual, the team learned lessons from the collapse of The DAO, and will build the resulting improvements into the USN. These include the implementation of what has been described as 'backdoors', but which Tual called "escape mechanisms", designed to cease the execution of a smart contract in certain extreme cases."

Well, at least they're building the backdoors on purpose now.


Read more from these links:

What is Ethereum Classic? Ethereum vs Ethereum Classic | https://blockgeeks.com/guides/what-is-ethereum-classic/

Ethereum Classic vs Ethereum: What’s the difference? | https://coincentral.com/ethereum-classic-vs-ethereum/

Analysis of the DAO exploit | http://hackingdistributed.com/2016/06/18/analysis-of-the-dao-exploit/

Ethereum is Doomed | Satoshi Nakamoto Institute | http://nakamotoinstitute.org/mempool/ethereum-is-doomed/

 

"Realizing they needed a 1.2 6 days after a 1.1, on code designed to be secure for years, is probably why the DAO's puppet masters called it quits."

Analysis of the DAO exploit | http://hackingdistributed.com/2016/06/18/analysis-of-the-dao-exploit/

 

Related: Security Alert – Parity Technologies | https://paritytech.io/blog/security-alert.html

Some random guy accidentally triggered a bug in the Parity coin wallet software... which permanently froze the fuckoo coins in every multi-sig Parity wallet running the July update. This includes PolkaDot, another blockchain technology that had something like $93,000,000 in its Parity wallet at the time of the bug.

"Hey man, some guy broke your wallet, and your account is frozen forever. Also everyone else's account is frozen forever. It's like we shot the money into space or somthing. Whoops!"

Whatever you can say about the dollar, at least a software update can't destroy a pile of bills under your mattress... yet.

 

The funny thing here is that when Ethereum broke all their promises to bail out the DAO's bullshit hacky code, people spun it as a sign of reliability and gave these people MORE MONEY. Hack after glitch vaporizing funds and people are still pouring millions of dollars into fuckoo coins. These things might have thirty years of retard gainz before they go supernova. Or three hours.

Either way, I like money, and I like getting rich quick. It's not a lotto ticket mom, it's on the blockchain, it's science. I have a system!

 

Many packages suddenly disappeared · Issue #255 · npm/registry · GitHub | https://github.com/npm/registry/issues/255

So NPM, Node Package Manager, aka the thing people use to build all their javascript projects now, is missing a few critical packages, just randomly dropped them for no reason. Jillions of people are finding out that all their shit is broken, can't even create basic apps in React because create-react-app fails due to missing packages.

One guy says he downloads packages locally deploys from those downloads, only using NPM for updates. For most people, they use NPM to build all their stuff, constantly redownloading from the cloud. Because, hey, it's massive and everybody uses it. What's the chance it will randomly break?

Not only that, but people are reuploading these packages with malware and hacks. Plenty of people could be downloading web tools and infecting their computer instead.

Everybody starts using automagical package distribution because it's convenient, creates single point of failure, then Everything Breaks At Once. Oops!

Many packages suddenly disappeared · Issue #255 · npm/registry · GitHub | https://github.com/npm/registry/issues/255

 

Reminds me of that time swedish goobernment outsorced all their IT-record keeping to shithole countries to save money and then wondered why every IT system the goobernment ran in sweden was compromised with TB of data "stolen" and "leaks" IE the "hackers" just logegd in using the log in and password given to them by the swedish goobernment itself. Also the plot of Battlestar Galactica, sort of.

 

I own fuckoo coins.

They're better than ZOGbucks.

I actually lost 4 ethereum to that parity bug.

Disclaimer: I haven't yet covered up my startup costs, solely on account of coinbase not making GBP payments. Otherwise I'd be fully in the green and sitting on a stack of internet money to boot.

When you don't trust the state, there's always mathematically verifiable mining.

 

If/when Amazon teams up with Alibaba, thats the real fuckoo coin. Corporations minting their own "gift cards", pay 10zogbucks get 15Amcoins etc etc, endgame being one egg in china costing as little as one egg in america, 1AM cents, i give you one egg you give me one egg, why should one american egg from the same hen be worth 10 in china from the same hen? True global equilibrium.
People would pay their utilites and such with 30% of their national buck income. then convert the rest into Amcoins, all stores are converted into a few Amazon warehouses where you walk in walk out and bill your account. Then you buy your electricity and internet from Amazon too... que everything.
That's the real fuckoo coin when governments are truly fucked. Itz not about hoarding 250 world currencies but replacing them effectively with one. They wanted globalizm and got it hard. If speculation is eliminated there can be no stock market technically speaking, or it can exist without mattering or impacting anything, just like the little crypto bubble implosion.

And then you will get a discount if you pay in gold/silver, thats cool to hoard if you are effectively the most powerful entity on earth. It will be so stable and predictable that the earth will turn flat, impossible to rock the boat. I for one welcome my new gift card overlords.

 

Circular dependencies for provisioning systems | http://rachelbythebay.com/w/2018/12/27/box/

"Has your company created a tool to let you run a command as root on a bunch of boxes in a massively parallel fashion? I bet it has one somewhere...

My guess? One command, five minutes. Poof. Back to the stone age.

Now what do you do?"